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December 23, 2013

Day 394: Things I Learned from My Fish

Brian Boitano passed away yesterday (the fish, not the human). I have yet to confirm his passing with my own eyes, but after responding affirmatively to my are-you-sure-he-isn’t-just-playing-dead questions, his trusted fish sitter has convinced me he is gone.

I feel sad about this. It’s easy for humans to feel attached to warm, furry things that remind us of cute little babies – but we do develop love and affection for the slimier species as well. Brian was a good fish and I miss him.

In his honor, here’s a list of four things I learned from the sometimes aggressive, sometimes lethargic, but always-graceful Brian Boitano.

Everybody feels better around plants. I couldn’t put real plants in Brian’s water (mold and the like – you know how it is), but when I moved his bowl to sit right next to my ivy plant, he recognized the green leaves and snuggled right up to them. Nature soothes, and is an important and often absent element to city life (or giant pickle-jar life, in Brian’s case).

Never underestimate the power of clean water. It probably sounds trite for me to say that watching my fish enjoy his monthly clean-water exchange gave me a higher sense of purpose when it comes to global water issues, but it’s true. Clean water is a precious resource and an absolute necessity that one in nine people do not currently have access to. For information on seven organizations committed to clean water access, water education and/or sustainable water use, check out this list from goodnet.org.

Lying around all the time is never a good thing. If you find yourself too tired to exercise, explore your world or eat, you’re in trouble. Mix it up and adjust your life before it’s too late.

Pink can be pretty and strong at the same time. Brian’s wavy fins would make beautiful sweeps and flourishes around the bowl (before he started lying around all the time), but he could probably bite your finger off if he really tried. He moved his marbles around, no problem. So the next time your little kid wants to wear a pink dress and climb a tree, just think of Brian. It’s totally cool.

(That’s Brian.)

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November 1, 2013

Day 340: Post-Halloween Brain Bust

It’s the day after Halloween. You probably spent last night gorging on candy, peeling sticky wrappers off of your adorably dressed kids, or – if you’re like me – you worked late, came home, put on sweatpants and watched Contact.

Either way, you’re in recovery mode. So what better way to get the ol’ mind moving again than by blowing it?

Aware of my nearly obsessive admiration of Neil deGrasse Tyson (who recently tweeted, “I love the smell of the universe in the morning.”) and longtime dream to meet Carl Sagan in some kind of heaven-like afterlife, one of my coworkers recently sent me this Radiolab Podcast (thanks, Brad).

In it, theoretical physicist Brian Greene uses statistics to make the case that there’s likely another you out there, doing the same thing you’re doing now. Not only that, there are an infinite number of other yous, doing the same thing or only slightly different things than you’re doing now. Or, doing the same thing or only slightly different things, with slightly different thoughts than you have now.

If everything that exists and can exist does exist, the odds simply point to the fact that there are more yous (I just paraphrased an enormous concept… don’t take my word for it – just listen to the Podcast).

The later part of this interview moves beyond the real universe (or universes) and posits that it’s more likely we actually live in a simulated universe as opposed to a real, natural one. Like, a universe manufactured by something or someone with a good grasp of technology.

Hoooh!

For me, the most interesting part of these concepts isn’t that they might be true, it’s that we can imagine them to be true. We’re equipped with this amazing capacity to be curious and eager and hungry to understand. We can conceptualize realities that are in direct conflict with our actual concepts of reality. It’s oxymoronic in the best way.

“To me, the most wonderous thing about science – and physics in particular – is the fact that through the power of thought and calculation and observation, you can be led to conclusions vastly at odds with what you would think based upon experience. I don’t think there’s anything more wonderous than that moment when you think the world is one way and your equations, your math, your ideas, your theories begin to convince you that is it another way.” – Brian Greene

Check it out. It’s 50 minutes long, but you’ve got time.

Image of the Coma cluster of galaxies from Nasa.gov

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October 23, 2013

Day 331: Advice About Being However Old You Are (especially if you’re in your 20s)

I keep seeing Facebook posts from my 20-something friends about 20-something stuff – everything from how to make the most of your 20s while you’re still young and free, to how to get through your 20s without having a complete meltdown.

At the ripe old age of 30, I feel I have to share my own wisdom on this topic. In fact, I’ve kind of shared it before. Here are some more helpful tidbits:

1. Things get better as you get older. You can argue this if you want, but it’s really all about state of mind. I know some pretty happy and awesome 80-somethings who aren’t worried about what’s going to happen to their youthful 80-year-old skin when they turn 90. They’re mostly just trying to see the world and soak it all in.

2. No one cares whether you’re 26 or 34. Once you’re no longer able to stay out until 3 a.m. and go for a spritely jog at 7 a.m. the next morning, those ages are pretty much all the same (although I continue to profess that 30 is, like, the best year ever).

3. You don’t need to accomplish [insert random measure of job or domestic success here] by the time you’re 30. My own opinion on the matter is that you should aim for having a healthy sense of self, a few really good books, some kind of experience in the online dating world (it’s just so cool and weird), and a credit card with a bunch of plane ticket purchases on it. Also, you should have a really good plan for paying off that card.

4. Habits are habits are habits. You can always make or break them – and you should, no matter how old you are. If you wasted your twenties doing what you always do and not learning how to build your own computer or light a one-match fire, have no fear. There’s still time to get going.

5. Look out and up. Make sure you’re good in your own mind and body, and then turn your focus away from yourself. You can be a force for positive change in the world no matter how old you are, but if you spend too much time reading about yourself on buzzfeed, you’ll have a hard time ever being happy. That said, this buzzfeed list shows a bunch of pugs wearing Halloween costumes. So, that’s cool.

6. You know. I mean, you just know. Your intuition has been lurking around in your gut for years, but once your metabolism slows down, you’ll finally start to notice it. Say hello to it. Nurture it. Listen to it. It’ll be your best friend, especially when its alternately advising you to stay home, turn off your phone, and get some sleep, or to get your butt out of your sweatpants and go to a dance party.

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October 3, 2013

Day 311: To My Sister on Her 19th Day of Marriage

Dear Sister,

Congratulations. Not because you’re married now, and not because you threw an amazing party that your guests begrudgingly left high on laughter and wine and still super sweaty from dancing to What Does the Fox Say.

Congratulations because you’re a thoughtful, intelligent, funny, caring, dedicated, driven and beautiful person. And you married a guy who respects, challenges and loves you. I am proud to call him my brother.

Watching you on your wedding day reminded me how incredibly lucky I am to be your (slightly older and incredibly knowledgable) sister. But mostly your friend. You move through life with a sort of fierce grace that I so admire.

Since I neglected to leave these at the wedding itself, here are my wishes for you and my new little bro:

May you foster a bright light in each other. May you feed the light’s flame should it ever start to dim.

May you help each other grow, with the wisdom that you can grow in different and complementary ways.

May you let the little things go. May you respect the big things.

May you laugh and laugh and laugh.

May you not try to change each other. May you commit to constant personal growth instead.

May you create a safe and welcoming space for each other.

May you support each other’s interests but not each other’s habits.

May you always think quirks are cute.

May you celebrate the beautiful world together. May you cry sometimes, too.

May you pause often and let angry words float quietly away.

May you understand each other’s needs. May you respect that your partner’s needs may be different than yours.

May you work and relax.

And may you always remember that you have two sisters, two brothers and a host of other lovelies who are there for you anytime you need really good advice, dance instruction, booze, a good book, an arm to lean on, pizza, a doctor, perspective, funny jokes and/or an open ear. We’re only an instant phone call or a short plane ride away.

(Also, thanks for picking out the killer bridesmaid dresses. Love, Ashleigh)

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September 2, 2013

Day 281: Weathertime Blues

There are so many complex, frightening, amazing and mind-boggling things happening in the world right now.

I’m going to ignore all of them and blog about the weather.

It smelled like fall yesterday, after a week of the kind of hot humidity that almost knocks you over when you step outside. The sky was a little grey and the trees rustled in this kind of brusque way that makes you think they know a long nap is coming soon.

So. I went to the gym. I made tea. I bought some music. I cleaned my apartment. I lamented that Brian Boitano didn’t seem as impressed with my cleanliness as I did. I tried to write a toast for my sister’s upcoming wedding. I took a shower. I thought about buying new running shoes for my sister’s upcoming wedding (there’s a pre-rehearsal 5K I should probably spend the next week training for). I harvested my basil. I ate a caprese salad. I looked at General Electric’s Instagram feed. I watered my plants. I felt sad.

In general, I had a lovely Sunday. But there is something about the coming of autumn that breeds a little melancholy. Whatever ease and frivolity summer brought will be swapped out with something a little more serious and measured soon. The kids feel it, especially – they’re all headed back to school to prep for becoming little adults.

Autumn is crisp and cool, and my nearly translucent skin is built for that sideways fall sunlight, but the summertime mourning period has officially begun.

Wherever you are (but especially if you’re in the Midwest), may you enjoy the green grass and bright flowers for just a few more weeks.

Happy Labor Day.

Summer.

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