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I can’t stop looking at pictures of cute, adoptable dogs. I. Can’t.

Take Cookie, for example. Cookie, who would be given the name Brian just as soon as she came home with me (it’s fine; it can be a girl name). She likes to snuggle and chase a toy? She’s perfect. But I can’t adopt her yet and I so wish I could.

It’s hard to admit that my lifestyle only allows me to take care of myself and a couple of cilantro seedlings. And maybe a cat, but I’d have to restructure my apartment to give it a stimulating living environment. (Sidebar: If you love cats, you’ll love this live stream of cats at the first ever Cat Café in NYC. It’s only up through Sunday, April 27, so if you click on the link and it’s gone—sorry!)

Happy pets live with owners who spend time with them, and I’d want my dog to be the happiest.

The ASPCA estimates that approximately 3.9 million dogs enter shelters each year in the United States. Each. Year. Only about 649,000 of those dogs are ‘lost’ and returned to their owners. That leaves over 3 million dogs just waiting to come home with me (or you). And the vast majority of them aren’t scary or mean or broken—they’re perfectly friendly and lovable. Like Cookie. Little charmer, that one.

So if you’re thinking about getting a dog, and you’ve got the time to play with, walk, run, rub, train and feed your future dog, please consider adoption and let me live through you vicariously. Also, please invite me over to your house to play with your dog. I’ll even be on poop patrol (like once).

That’s Bam Bam, an adoptable dog in Minnesota. OMG. Take that pup home!